Reconsider Me Read online

  Oh, no, he did-unt.

  But before Joel could speak up, his mom did. “Because he’s my son’s husband, and he’s immediate family, and I want him in there with us. That’s why. The rest of you sit yerselves down and wait out here and we’ll tell you what’s goin’ on when we get out.”

  She hooked her arm through Joel’s free arm and practically dragged him, and Fen, along after the undertaker. Celia, Jackson, and the two aunts followed.

  Behind them, he heard Aunt Ginny, who was nearly deaf, speak in what he was sure she thought was a whisper to Aunt Gloria.

  “I thought that boy worked here, way he was dressed.”

  “So did I.”

  “I didn’t know he was—”

  Joel turned and gave them an angry glare and both women shut up, looking like guilty children caught talking in church.

  I might need Fen to pick me up a bottle of vodka or something to get me through the next couple of days.

  Fortunately, the funeral was pre-paid, and his parents had already decided on most of the stuff. It’d be held at the Methodist church his mom attended, the graveside service in the cemetery next door, and the wake to follow at the Fellowship Hall.

  The soonest it could be held, coordinated on the phone by the undertaker talking to the minister, was Monday afternoon.

  That meant a day and a half—weekend days—of people coming over to the house to see Mom and pay their respects and bring food.

  Definitely gonna need vodka.

  They got through that, Gloria and Ginny objecting over every other detail despite being repeatedly told that it was pre-decided and pre-paid. They were finally able to leave the funeral home nearly two hours later, after informing the other relatives gathered there what was happening, and when, and fielding more objections from people who had to repeatedly be told no, the funeral was pre-arranged, per Joel’s father’s wishes.

  The biggest request from the peanut gallery had been an open casket, which his father had specifically and emphatically said he did not want.

  Even the undertakers had abandoned them when they had to set up for a funeral that was going to start in about two hours.

  Joel was bombarded once again by a shit-ton of questions when a voice rose from the ranks.

  “Quiet!”

  Fen stood there, hands raised to get everyone’s attention. When the room fell silent, he pounced, using a drawl Joel had never heard him speak before but made him sound like he was from there.

  “Now, I know y’all have your opinions, but it’s time to have respect for the dead. Mr. Burch made these arrangements himself, and I know y’all wouldn’t want him disrespected like that. We need to take Mrs. Burch back to the house and get her settled in. If y’all wanna come by the house later today, please pass the word not to arrive before four. She needs time to rest and pull herself together before a bunch of people swarm her. Understand?”

  Everyone looked at each other, then, finally, one of the cousins nodded, which triggered a chain reaction of nods, and Fen smiled.

  “Good. Thank you. Now, y’all need to go on. They need this place ready for another funeral here soon, and we need to clear it out and the parking lot. Okay?”

  People started moving toward the door. As they did, Joel heard Aunt Ginny again.

  “See? I told you he has to work for the funeral home. That proves it. You’re just goin’ senile.”

  Joel clapped a hand over his mouth and struggled not to burst into laughter.

  * * * *

  The next day and a half passed in a blur of faces and people and food.

  So.

  Much.

  Food.

  Fen had never seen that quantity of food in his life. Especially deviled eggs and potato salad. There must have been as many ways to make them as there were people bringing them. Barb, as she’d asked Fen to call her, had skipped going to church Sunday morning due to sheer emotional exhaustion. And after church, as the word had gotten around, more people swarmed them.

  Fen got to know where the local Walmart was, because he made several trips for stuff they needed at the house, like toilet paper, paper plates, plastic cups, and foam cups for coffee.

  So.

  Much.

  Coffee.

  He finally picked up a cheapie coffeemaker to add to the mix to help keep up with the demand.

  And he learned how to make iced tea from tea bags.

  Saturday and Sunday nights, they made it back to the hotel late to collapse. One of Joel’s older cousins had already gotten herself thrown out of the house by Barb when the woman had made a nasty comment to Fen where Barb could overhear her.

  The house had fallen silent as the woman raised her voice.

  “Anyone else got a problem with my son and his husband? Because we can have us one right now if you do, and you can get the hell outta my house.”

  No one took her up on that offer, and after a moment, conversation had eventually picked up again.

  Apparently that story had made the rounds, because no one else said a bad word about Fen or Joel. At least not where Barb could hear them.

  Monday afternoon, Fen drove the family over to the church early. There wasn’t a visitation except for the hour before the service. Barb hadn’t wanted one, and figured anyone who wanted to see her could have come over to the house, or could see her there.

  It was hot and muggy and Fen had been equally shocked to be named one of the pallbearers by Barb. Not only had he never done that before, he was by far the shortest guy chosen for the roster.

  He didn’t argue.

  When the time came, he took his place in the middle, behind Joel, and together they all carried the casket out to the cemetery, where the grave awaited.

  Another brief graveside prayer, and then it was lowered in.

  They were trudging through the cemetery grass over toward the Fellowship Hall when Fen heard a man’s voice speak up.

  “Hey, Joel. Long time, no see.”

  Fen watched Joel’s head jerk up, from where he’d been watching where he was walking with his mom on his arm as they picked their way around gravestones.

  Joel handed her off to Jackson and started toward the man, fists clenched. “Get out of here, you sonofabitch.”

  Fen’s pulse spiked, and he knew without asking who the fuck this was. He darted around people and intercepted Joel before Joel could take a swing at the man. Fen wrapped his arms around Joel from the front and struggled to push him back.

  “He’s not worth it, Sir,” Fen whispered. “He’s trying to bait you.”

  “Read about the funeral in the paper. Figured as good a way as any to get a look atchoo now,” the guy continued in an accent Fen suspected was Louisiana in origin. “How’s your family like you now, huh? Took you down a few pegs, didn’t I? You drop me like that, I warned you. Now your whole town knows whatchoo like. Then you go runnin’ off like a coward, dincha? Told you I’d make you regret leavin’ me. Best thing you ever had, you.”

  “Motherfucker!” Joel growled, and Fen was now being helped by Jackson, who’d wrapped his arms around Joel’s waist from behind.

  Fen glanced back at the guy. Nearly Joel’s height, not as broad across the shoulders, kind of on the thin side, wearing denim cargo shorts and a T-shirt for a casino Fen had never heard of. His shaggy hair and scruffy face might have looked handsome in other circumstances, but Fen wanted blood on his guy’s behalf.

  He did a few quick calculations, gauged the distance, and scoped out the headstones behind the guy.

  Then he lunged, shoving Joel back toward Jackson and using that for added momentum.

  He landed on the guy, the force of his lunge and the element of surprise helping Fen knock the guy backward over a knee-high headstone. In the process, Fen also caught him in the groin with one knee and landed with his forearm braced across the guy’s windpipe.

  “You so much as ever look at him again, you pencil-dicked piece of fucking swamp trash,” Fen whispered, “and I’ll hu
nt you down and gut you like a fucking pig and leave you for dead. My dad’s a cop and I learned a lot from him, asshole. See if I don’t.”

  He let Joel and Jackson pull him up and off Johnny, who’d started gasping for air and coughing as soon as he could draw a breath in again without Fen’s weight on him. Johnny clutched at his balls, moaning in pain as Joel and Jackson dragged Fen back.

  “Get out of here,” Joel ordered. “We’ll call the cops on you. Bet you’re probably in violation of probation for something anyway. I know at least ten people here will say you attacked Fen. No one’s gonna believe your word over his.”

  Johnny finally crawled to his feet. “You’re gonna be fuckin’ sorry, asshole.”

  “Yeah, I’m already sorry I ever laid eyes on you in the first place, you lousy sack of shit. You get the hell out of here before I finish what he started.”

  They lost sight of him heading through the trees ringing the cemetery as he staggered toward the parking lot. Joel’s mom started waving everyone toward the hall, waiting there with Jackson and Joel and Fen until she could talk to them without being overheard.

  She leaned in and kissed Fen on the cheek, wiping away the smudge of lipstick she left behind. She wore a smile. “Sugar, I think that was the best thing I’ve seen in my entire life.”

  “Sorry, Barb.”

  She patted his shoulder. “Mom,” she said.

  Joel brushed the grass and leaves from Fen’s jacket, buying him a moment for the others to walk ahead.

  Then he grabbed Fen and kissed him, hard. “I should spank your ass for that, baby, but I’m too fucking horny from watching you do it.”

  “I’m assuming that was Johnny?”

  Joel grinned. “You weren’t sure?”

  “I had a pretty good hunch. If it wasn’t him, he sure seemed like someone who needed a good ass-kicking.”

  “I love you, baby. So fucking much. What’d you say to him?”

  “Told him he’d better leave you alone, that you were mine.” He kissed Joel. “And that you said he sucked in bed compared to me.”

  Joel roared with laughter.

  * * * *

  Four hours later, after the wake at the Fellowship Hall finally ended, they returned to his mom’s house, exhausted and, for the first time in days, alone.

  “Thank god that’s over,” she said as she collapsed on the couch. She stared up at her children. “I’mma gonna snatch a knot in Gloria’s tail she asks me about that damned pocket watch one more time. I keep tellin’ her Jason didn’t get it when her father died, and she doesn’t believe me.”

  Celia sat next to her on the couch. “Do you want me to take tomorrow off from work?”

  “No. You two go back to work. Best thing for you right now. Come over for dinner tomorrow night.” She looked up at Joel. “Can you two stay for a couple of days for a visit?”

  He couldn’t say no. “Sure, Mom.”

  “Go check out of that hotel and you can use your old room.” She reached a hand out toward Fen. He took her hand and let her pull him down onto the couch. “I kept tellin’ people you were Joel’s husband. I guess you proved to them all you were.”

  “Sorry I lost my temper. It’s his fault Joel didn’t get to see his dad again.”

  “You’re a good man.” She ruffled his hair. “I’m glad he picked someone so protective.”

  Fen smiled up at Joel. “I love him.”

  Celia and Jackson stayed with their mom while Fen and Joel packed and checked out. Later that night, curled together in what had been his room, Joel kissed the back of Fen’s neck. “When we get home, you’re getting the blowjob of your life, mister.”

  Fen giggled. “People always underestimate me. That’s their first mistake.”

  “And my lucky break.”

  They finally left late Thursday evening, far later than Joel had planned. Joel had helped his mom by doing some things around the farm for her, and had put her in touch with Ivy, who’d already made arrangements to drive up the next week to start helping her figure out her next move.

  And Joel’s mom had fun teaching Fen how to cook some of Joel’s old favorites that he’d wondered if he’d ever taste again.

  She’d also given Fen a well-used and loved cast-iron skillet that had belonged to his dad’s mom. Many meals full of love had been cooked within its well-seasoned rim.

  It also meant that his mom had fully accepted Fen as part of the family.

  Fen had also taken scans of her recipe book with his phone, saving them as PDFs so he could print them out when he got home. More favorites of Joel’s, food he’d grown up eating and had missed more than he’d realized over the past eight years.

  Once again, Fen was driving. “Thank you for this,” Joel said. “You have no idea how much. Especially handling Johnny.”

  “Can I admit something now that we’re alone?”

  “Sure.”

  “I wasn’t going to let you go after him. If one of us was arrested, I wanted it to be me.”

  “Why?”

  “Because this isn’t Tampa or Miami. I had a strong suspicion if a detective from Sarasota called the police department here and talked to someone, he could probably get the charges reduced or dropped. Or at the very least finagle something so I’d be released without bail.”

  Joel stared at him, processing that before he started laughing. It roared out of him and kept rolling out of him even as they pulled in at a Speedway for a gas and bathroom stop.

  When they got on the road again, bladders empty and the gas tank and coffee cups full, he heard Fen make a noise.

  “What?”

  “Nothing, I guess. That car that just passed us. I’ve seen it several times.” They were almost to the juncture at I-75. From there, it’d be less than five hours home.

  “I’ve seen several cars we keep seeing. That’s common along this stretch. You leapfrog them. I used to pass trucks going back and forth from Pensacola, get off for gas, and then pass ’em again a few miles down the road.”

  “True.”

  They reached Sarasota a little before three a.m. and went to Joel’s because it was closer to an exit off I-75. Plus he needed work clothes for in the morning and had to get his car.

  As they collapsed into his bed without bothering to unpack, he pulled Fen in close. “Can I give you a rain check on the blowjob, baby?”

  “Please, yes. I just want to sleep right now.”

  And they did.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Fen dragged himself to work Friday morning. Jake stopped by his cube. “How’s Joel doing?”

  “He’s getting through it. My mom’s going to go help Joel’s mom with stuff. She’s thinking about maybe coming for a visit and looking around at buying a condo. We’re thinking about possibly renting a house and seeing if the owner of Joel’s condo will sell to her. It’d be the perfect building for her. Secure, lots of people to be friends with.”

  “That’d be awesome.”

  “Yeah.” He leaned back in his chair and yawned. “Sorry.”

  “You sure you don’t want to go home and rest?”

  “Nah, I want to get caught up. I’ll probably stay late today and go right back to Joel’s tonight.” He could wear the clothes he’d taken to Alabama to work. Frankly, he didn’t want to go home if Joel wasn’t going to be there, too.

  Joel surprised him by showing up at his office at nearly eight that night. Only Fen and two of the machinists working out back were still there.

  “Ready to go, baby? I got us a pizza.”

  Fen nodded. He’d gotten a lot done today, actually. Being able to work from Joel’s mom’s had helped. But they were so exhausted that after eating and taking a shower together, they fell into bed.

  The next morning, Fen watched Joel getting ready to go to work. Despite it being a Saturday, Joel had to, because unlike Fen’s job, there weren’t as many people to take up the slack, and he couldn’t work remotely.

  Not only had Joel said they were goin
g to the club tonight, they were going to spend most of the weekend in bed at Fen’s. “You going to let me cook you dinner before we go to the club, Sir?” Fen pulled Joel’s pillow into his arms and pressed his face against it, deeply inhaling his scent.

  He was hoping he could fill Joel’s stomach and make him want to stay home and cash in the blowjob rain check.

  “I’ll bring extra clothes and my toybag and we can go there after we eat. I should be at your place around three. How’s that?”

  Fen smiled. “Perfect. That’ll give me time to go shopping.”

  “Why do you look like you have a surprise planned?”

  “Because maaaaybe I do, Sir.”

  Joel leaned in and kissed him. “Love you, sugar.”

  “Love you, too, Sir.”

  “Sorry I can’t take a full day off today. Me being gone put us behind.”

  “No, it’s okay. You need to work.”

  Once Joel had left for the morning, Fen finally tried to peel himself out of bed—and made it. He still preferred his bed to Joel’s. Joel’s was only a queen, and his was a king. It was nice having that extra bit of room to move around in.

  Sure, he was spoiled. That was the point of being a responsible adult, that you could save up and buy the stuff you really wanted. He’d gladly enjoy and love his thrift-store furniture as long as his mattress was good quality.

  The benefit of being in Joel’s bed was, of course, Joel.

  He started a load of laundry—another benefit of Joel’s condo, he had a full washer and dryer—and began tidying up the place, including emptying the food from the fridge. By the time he left, it was nearly noon, and he’d finished the laundry and folded it, putting Joel’s away and neatly stashing his in the basket to take home.

  Next stop, the grocery store. Being a Saturday, it was, of course, crazy. As he looked at the recipes he’d scanned onto his phone, he grinned as he stopped in the produce section. They had a huge display of green tomatoes.

  Perfect!

  He hummed to himself as he shopped, letting his mind drift. Thinking about when they could get a house of their own, how nice it’d be to have the room to throw parties for their friends—kinky and vanilla ones—someplace where they could get as loud as they wanted when Joel spanked him—and made him come.