Hope Heals Read online

In the taxi on the way back to LaGuardia, Sarah called her dad and gave him the quick version, which almost took as long to tell as it had happened in real life.

  “Good. I’m glad that’s settled. Sam and Pete will pick you up.”

  “Can I talk to Jason?”

  “He’s…uh, not here right now.”

  She nearly smacked her forehead. “Oh, duh. Swim team. Dana was going to take them.”

  “Yeah, that’s it,” he quickly said. “Love you, sweetheart.”

  “Love you too, Daddy. Here’s Betty.” She handed the phone to her and settled back in her seat. Familiar sights passed by outside her window, but it didn’t feel like home.

  Whereas her first impression of New York so many years ago had been one of wonder and excitement, now all she felt was dread. Even the dreary, overcast day echoed her feelings of the city.

  They arrived and got checked in nearly three hours before their flight was due to depart. She’d brought her laptop, thinking maybe she’d get some work done, but decided to leave it in her carry-on. With this hurdle in the past she could relax. Instead of waiting by the gate, they opted to stop at a bar, where they ordered appetizers and Sarah indulged in a rum and Coke at Betty’s encouragement.

  The older woman chose a Bloody Mary.

  “I can’t help but think,” Sarah said, “that she’ll try something else.”

  “Whether she does or doesn’t, you worrying about it won’t change it one way or the other.” Betty munched on her celery stick. “She might think she’s above the rules, and I’m sure your ex’s lying to and colluding with her all those years didn’t help things any, but she’s going to quickly have her little self-important bubble popped.”

  Betty frowned. “I’m kind of sorry she didn’t start something with me today. I was looking forward to letting her have it.”

  Sarah giggled, the alcohol already going to her head due to an empty stomach before the appetizers arrived. She’d only had a bagel for breakfast, and had been too nervous to eat lunch despite Betty begging her to. “I would have loved to see that.”

  “We Florida Cracker girls are feisty.” She pointed her piece of celery at Sarah. “Don’t ever forget your roots, honey. You mess with a Florida Cracker girl, you’re messing with the wrong girl.”

  Sarah held her drink up in a toast. “To us Cracker girls.”

  “Here, here.” They clinked without spilling them, but both women started giggling. “I think Walt will be upset with me I bring you home drunk.”

  “Well, we’ll both be drunk, so it won’t matter much.”

  The flight was uneventful, except that they both kept the celebration going so that when their flight touched down in Tampa, they had to hold onto each other on the tram ride from the airside back to the main terminal.

  As they stepped out of the shuttle doors into the main terminal, they linked arms, their other hands holding onto their rolling carry-on bags. Sam and Pete wore odd looks on their faces as they stepped forward to greet them once they’d exited the secure area.

  Sarah dropped her bag and draped her arms around Sam’s neck. “Hiya, cutie!” She kissed him.

  “Oh…wow. Are you drunk, babe?”

  Betty grabbed Pete’s arm for balance. “Not any worse than I am.”

  The men exchanged a glance that started Sarah giggling. “Hey, we celebrated.”

  “We can see that,” Pete said.

  Sarah pointed at Betty. “It’s her fault. She’s the responsible adult.”

  Betty let out a snort. “Says who? They’re a dirty, rotten liar.”

  Pete kept an arm around Betty’s waist as he took her bag. “Come on, ladies. The chariot awaits.”

  Sam kept a firm grip on Sarah as they took an elevator up to the parking garage. They’d brought Pete’s SUV and had to help the women into the backseat.

  “Give me some warning if either of you have to puke, okay?” He climbed behind the wheel.

  Sarah laid her head back and waved his warning off. “The buzz is already wearing off, spoilsport. We weren’t that tanked.”

  Sam turned from where he rode shotgun. “You’re both going to be regretting this in the morning, I bet.”

  Betty let out a snort. “What do I look like, an amateur? I’ll be sober by midnight.” She pointed at Sarah. “I wouldn’t be surprised if she’s hungover in the morning.”

  “It’s worth it.” She rarely drank because of Jason. It felt good to let loose with Betty and just relax for a couple of hours without any cares.

  “I’ll remind you you said that in the morning,” Sam told her.

  * * * *

  Sarah woke up when they bumped over the dip at the end of the driveway marking the turnoff from the road. “Are we home?”

  Pete glanced at her in the mirror. “Yes, we’re home.”

  “That was fast.” Yes, the buzz was gone. Darn it.

  She stared at the pasture, leaning forward when she saw something weird. “Whoa, stop the car.”

  “What’s wrong? Are you going to be sick?”

  She unbuckled her seat belt and smacked his shoulder. “Stop the goddamned car!”

  He did. Sarah piled out and walked over to the fence. While her initial glimpse of the animal at the outer reaches of the headlights had made her think something was really wrong with Big Mac, now she realized she’d been mistaken.

  Big Mac had a buddy.

  Both animals lumbered over toward the fence as the men and Betty joined her.

  Sarah’s jaw gaped as she stared.

  Big Mac stuck his head over the fence and nuzzled at her. She pet him as she stared.

  The horse, a sorrel with a white blaze down its muzzle, wasn’t much taller than Big Mac.

  “I don’t fucking believe it.”

  Pete nervously coughed as Betty started laughing. “Oh, boy,” she said. “Maybe I should walk the rest of the way home.”

  Sarah shook her head. “I cannot believe Dad bought him a fucking horse! No wonder he sounded off on the phone earlier.”

  “Um,” Sam said, “well, he didn’t.”

  She left her hand on Big Mac’s muzzle as she turned. “I’m not that drunk. I’m not suddenly seeing imaginary horses.” She looked back at the animal, who took a couple steps closer and extended his nose close enough to sniff at Sarah’s palm. “At least, I don’t think I’m that drunk,” she muttered.

  Pete coughed again. “Walt didn’t buy it.”

  “What?” The horse, apparently deciding if Big Mac liked her that she must be okay, stepped up to the fence and pushed his nose against her hand.

  “We did,” Sam said.

  She stared at the horse for a moment before slowly turning toward the men. “What?” she whispered.

  Pete took the lead. “We bought him. He belonged to my brother’s daughter, and she outgrew him. She’s training in a hunter class now and he bought her another horse, and when he asked if we knew anyone trustworthy who might want him…”

  She blinked as she stared at them.

  The horse stuck its head over the fence and nosed her in the back.

  “You bought my son a horse without asking me?” Her scream echoed through the darkness and made both animals take a step away from the fence.

  Sarah clenched her fists as she approached the men, who retreated around the front of the SUV. “I cannot believe you two! Why didn’t you ask me about this first? You know I can’t afford to take care of a horse!”

  “We asked your dad,” Pete said, hands up in front of him as they continued retreating around the SUV with her in pursuit. “He told us it was okay. And besides, we’re going to pay for his care. It’s our gift to Jason. We got a trailer and tack and everything. And Dana’s kids love him, too.”

  The scream built so deep and heavy she finally opened her mouth to release it and the force of her rage silently popped in the air in front of her. After throwing her hands up in the air, she wheeled around and started storming up the driveway toward the house.

&n
bsp; Behind her, she heard the vehicles’ doors close, but it was Pete who came up behind her and grabbed her shoulder.

  “Babe—”

  She shook him off without stopping. “Don’t. Don’t even.”

  He kept following her but didn’t try to stop her again. Behind them, the headlights illuminated her way up the driveway. When she threw the front door open, her dad looked up from where he sat in the living room, startled from the book he’d been reading.

  She stalked over to him. “Why didn’t you tell me?” she growled, keeping her voice low. “Why the hell didn’t you say something to me?”

  “About—”

  “About the damn horse!” She lowered her voice again, mindful of Jason sleeping just down the hall. “Why didn’t you tell me they’d asked you about buying a horse?”

  He closed his book. “Because I knew you’d say no.”

  Sam, toting Sarah’s overnight bag, walked through the front door, Betty following him.

  “Damn right I’d have said no. I can’t afford a horse, Dad!”

  He stood and looked down his nose at her. “Then consider it my horse, if that makes you feel better. The horse stays. And his name is Gilbert.”

  She started to say something but her jaw snapped shut.

  Just when she thought the night couldn’t get any weirder…

  “Gilbert?”

  He nodded.

  “You’re shitting me. The horse’s name is Gilbert.”

  He nodded again.

  “What the hell kind of name is that for a horse?”

  “Same kind as Big Mac for a steer,” Sam quipped.

  Betty shushed him.

  “I don’t…I have no…I can’t even…Arrgghh!” She headed down the hall to her bathroom, where she locked herself in and started the shower. If she tried to say anything else to anyone, she’d end up screaming it.

  They bought him a freaking horse.

  As she stepped under the hot water, she turned her face toward the spray.

  A horse named Gilbert.

  That’s when the giggles hit. Snorting, bubbling giggles she knew she couldn’t control that morphed into full-belly laughter she barely managed to keep quiet so she didn’t wake Jason up. As she slid to the floor of the tub, her hand clamped over her mouth and she laughed, her anger slowly washing away.

  Gilbert.

  More laughter she couldn’t even begin to control.

  I just hope the damn goats don’t teach him to climb onto the roof.

  By the time the water ran cold and she dragged herself out of the shower, Betty had left and her dad and the men stood waiting for her in the kitchen.

  “Feeling better?” her dad asked.

  She shot him a dark glare as she reached for the bottle of ibuprofen and a glass of water.

  He smiled. “If it’s any consolation, he was already named Gilbert. Jason didn’t want to change his name.”

  She let out a breath she wasn’t aware she’d been holding. “A horse, Dad? Really?”

  He shrugged, a playful grin on his face. “I’m sorry, but Grandma Izzy’s got nothing on us.”

  She clapped her hand over her mouth to stifle the snort of laughter and let him engulf her in a hug. When he let her go she walked over to her men and opened her arms to them, too.

  “Thank you,” she murmured. “I’m sorry I lost it.”

  “Your dad swore us to secrecy,” Pete said. “Blame him.”

  She kissed Pete, then Sam. “Sorry I’m not in much of a romantic mood tonight.”

  “How about we stay with you until you fall asleep,” Sam suggested. “Just snuggling.”

  Her dad smiled and waved at them. “Good night, kids.” He left them alone.

  “A snuggle sounds good,” she said.

  She let them lead her back to her bedroom, where she donned a T-shirt and the three of them crammed into her full-sized bed.

  As she closed her eyes and snuggled with them, she asked, “You realize I’m a broken toy, right?”

  Sam, then Pete, kissed her forehead. “No you’re not,” Sam whispered. “You’re beautiful and perfect.”

  “And all ours,” Pete added.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Gilbert actually grew on Sarah. He was more like a big dog than a farm animal, always coming up to the fence and whinnying at her if she didn’t immediately stop what she was doing and go pet him. Every morning he followed them down the driveway to stand there while Jason waited for the bus, and every afternoon when the bus pulled up, the horse ran up to the fence and followed them back to the house.

  And Jason became proficient enough riding the small, gentle horse that as long as he wore his helmet and didn’t leave the pasture, he could ride without someone being there to supervise him.

  He also started getting up earlier every morning to go out and feed him before school while her dad fed the other animals.

  She was proud of him for taking the responsibility seriously.

  As September melted into October, they settled into a comfortable routine. Her nightmare of a few months earlier seemed like just that, a nightmare.

  This was home. And she’d never been happier.

  Jason, Dell, and Sage all did well on their swim team. So when it came time for Halloween, Sarah was glad the Y was holding a party and trick-or-treat fest, because she knew people never stopped by their house, unless they were relatives. They were too far off the main road for people to make the drive. The lack of sidewalks in their rural area also inhibited door-to-door trick-or-treating.

  When she was a kid, it wasn’t uncommon for her mom and dad to take her over to one of their friends’ houses, and let her go trick-or-treating with their kids so she could actually do it.

  All the adults were all dressing up. Sarah had opted for a pirate wench outfit with an ankle-length skirt, one suitable to wear at a mixed-age event. She was a little nervous about her men going, since they wouldn’t reveal what their costumes were, but she loved them for insisting on being a part of the festivities.

  She wouldn’t have it any other way.

  In reality, Sam and Pete had been more active in Jason’s life than Michael had. One or both of them went to every one of Jason’s swim meets to cheer him on, and they’d stepped up to help sponsor some of the team’s fundraising activities.

  They were also over at the house every night for dinner, as was Betty.

  And Michael had only been around to take Jason trick-or-treating once, last year.

  At least Jason would have that good memory of his father.

  Jason still hadn’t talked much about his dad. Everyone discussed it when he wasn’t around, and it wasn’t just with Sarah he’d remained silent on the subject. He hadn’t mentioned Michael to anyone. Dana had even worked it into conversation with Sage and Dell and reported he hadn’t talked to them about Michael, either.

  But Jason appeared happy, had quickly adjusted to his new school, seemed to love his teacher, and was excelling on the swim team.

  According to the school’s guidance counselor, whom Sarah talked with about it again, he appeared to be a perfectly well-adjusted seven-year-old boy. Maybe even better off than some kids in “normal” nuclear families.

  Although Sarah had left off the part about her having not one, but two boyfriends.

  Before the Halloween party, they would all meet up at the Heckmans’ and caravan over to the Y, Sarah and Jason with Sam and Pete, and Walt and Betty with Dana and the twins. Sam and Pete were running a little late, and when Sarah heard a knock on the sliders she turned and started laughing.

  The men wore a cow costume.

  And they’d glued pink tennis balls to the horns.

  She started laughing so hard she tripped backward, tangled in her skirt, and landed on the couch. As the others turned and saw what she’d seen, they roared, too.

  Sam, the tail end, straightened with a grin as Pete removed the head. Sam opened the sliders. “Well? What do you think? We’re Big Mac.”

&nb
sp; Sarah fell over on her side on the couch, helplessly laughing.

  * * * *

  They all had fun at the party. Big Mac was a hit, and the three kids had filled their plastic pumpkins with candy and other goodies handed out.

  Back at home, after everyone else left and Sarah had Jason settled in bed, Sarah returned to the living room where her dad and Betty were talking with Pete and Sam. The men had changed into shorts and T-shirts before leaving the party.

  Sam turned and grinned. Before Sarah could react, he’d scooped her up over his shoulder and headed toward the back sliders. “We’ll send her home in the morning,” he said.

  She had to bite back the surprised yell she’d almost let loose. “What are you going?” she said.

  “Abducting the pirate wench,” Pete answered.

  Betty and her dad both laughed, seeing them off with a wave. “Have fun, you three,” he said.

  She stared at Pete, who’d shut the door behind him. “What?” he innocently asked with a devilish grin.

  “Jason’s going to catch you doing this one day, you realize that, right?”

  Pete hurried around Sam to open the lanai door for him. He headed around the hedge line and toward the gate in their fence. “So?” he replied. “It won’t matter once the two of you are moved in with us.”

  That shocked her. “What?” she gasped.

  Sam stopped and set her down on her feet in the middle of the yard. He took one of her hands in his while Pete took the other. Both of them dropped to their knees and looked up at her.

  “We know you can’t make us any promises right now,” Pete solemnly said, “but we both love you.”

  “And Jason,” Sam added.

  “Right,” Pete continued. “And we know it’ll take time for you to get to a point where you’re ready to make this forever.”

  “But we’re telling you right now,” Sam said, “that we’re calling permanent dibs on you. If you’ll have us. When you’re ready to take the next step, it won’t take us any time at all to move you in with us.”

  “Both of you,” Pete added. “We love both of you. We want to be Jason’s dad. Dads.” He looked at Sam, who nodded.

  She didn’t know what to say.