The Reluctant Dom Read online

  “Okay.” She closed her eyes and relaxed in Seth’s arms under the warm spray. “Let me catch my breath, and I’ll scrub your back for you before I go check on him.”

  Seth tried not to feel a guilty pang for enjoying this time alone with her. He should be past that now. He knew, ironically, if it wasn’t for the fact—

  kaden’sdying

  —that the future was hanging over their heads, he wouldn’t feel guilty.

  As guilty, anyway.

  When he was alone in the shower a few minutes later, he rested his head against the tile and let the tears flow. This was his alone time, something he desperately needed. It was the only way to release his crushing grief without his friends seeing. He didn’t care if Leah wanted him to lean on her. If he really did that she would collapse under the weight of his emotions. Hell, it was barely all he could do to keep a lid on it.

  He made it out to the kitchen twenty minutes later. Leah wasn’t there. He hoped that meant she was spending private time with Kade.

  And he smiled as he realized he wasn’t the least bit jealous at that thought.

  Progress.

  He hummed to himself as he spooned out a bowlful of stuffing left over from the batch they’d made for the turkeys, then he walked out to the couch to eat and watch the news. The first guests wouldn’t start arriving until nearly noon, so he wasn’t worried about someone catching him half-dressed except Leah and Kaden. And since they’d seen him nekkid more times than he could count, they didn’t count.

  Kaden walked out a few minutes later, bleary-eyed and yawning. “Morning.”

  “Morning.” He studied Kaden. “Where’s Leah?”

  He smiled. “She’ll be out in a minute. Oh, here.” He tossed Seth something. Seth quickly realized it was the remote control for the butterfly.

  “What’s this for?”

  Kaden had made it to the kitchen. “She got a little pushy with me this morning,” he called out. “Was trying to tell me to stay in bed. So I decided she needed a little reminder who’s in charge.” He returned with his mug. “She has to wear it until one.”

  Seth snorted in amusement. “One?”

  Kaden nodded and started back toward the bedroom. “Under her clothes.”

  Seth shook his head and looked at the remote before slipping it into the pocket of his shorts. “This should be interesting,” he muttered.

  Leah appeared a few minutes later, fully dressed in a blouse and jeans, wearing her silver day collar and looking a tad…uncomfortable. He barely heard the faint humming of the butterfly.

  “So you got a little pushy, hmm?”

  She blushed. “I wasn’t trying to be. I just wanted him to rest.”

  He stood and walked over to her, then handed her his empty bowl. Brushing the hair back from her neck he whispered, “He gave me the remote. When the guests arrive, I’ll turn it off. But you still have to wear it as long as he says.”

  She breathed a deep sigh of relief. “Thank you!” She kissed him and went to the kitchen.

  Seth wasn’t an idiot. He was well aware Kaden knew Seth wouldn’t fully torment her with vanilla people around.

  Kaden, however, was more than devious enough to do it. And Kade probably realized the temptation to torture her would be too great if he held the remote.

  Seth finished dressing and helped Leah and Kade in the kitchen. He loved surprising her with the vibrator, usually just as she was reaching for something. Around eleven thirty, and no guests had arrived yet as she helped him outside in the backyard. He had to pre-measure how much oil he’d need for the turkey by using water in the pot to find the level. Leah was holding the bird for him while he filled the pot.

  “Okay, set it in there.”

  She did. Once her hands were empty, he stepped behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. Then he slid one hand between her legs and firmly pressed the butterfly tight against her. He felt it buzzing through the denim.

  He nibbled on her neck behind her ear. “You being a good girl, now?”

  “Yes!” she gasped.

  He pressed a little more firmly, giving her enough contact with the device to really feel it. “If you can come for me right now, I’ll turn it off and leave it off, but you still have to wear it until Master told you.”

  She nodded and threw her head back against his shoulder. He gently rubbed his hand in circles between her legs and she moaned. She was so close.

  He used his other hand to gently pinch her nipples, rolling them through the fabric of her shirt, alternating from one to the other.

  “Come for me, babe,” he whispered. “Come hard for me.”

  She ground her hips against his hand. He knew she was close. Just when he thought he might have to stop, she let out a soft cry and tensed in his arms. “That’s it, babe. Come for me.” He was there to hold her as her post-climax weakness hit, and he lowered her to the grass and sat behind her.

  “How was that?”

  She nodded, her head still resting against his shoulder. He reached into his pocket and shut off the vibrator. “Okay, sweetie. A deal’s a deal.”

  She turned her head and kissed him. A playful smile filled her face. “You’re finally getting into the spirit of this, aren’t you?”

  He shrugged. “Maybe when I hit my stride I can find some things to do for you in my own way.”

  She closed her eyes and snuggled against him, her face buried in the crook of his neck. “I’m sure you will.”

  “Okay, enough loafing. Master will come looking for us and might find other ways to torture you if he thinks you’re goofing off.” He stood, then helped her to her feet.

  * * * *

  It was easy for Seth to stay distracted once the guests started arriving. He knew, at least in passing, most of the people invited. He noticed Kaden leaned in to Leah around one o’clock and whispered something. She hurried down the hall to their bedroom.

  Ah. He’d finally let her loose.

  Kaden looked over at him from across the room and winked. Seth smiled and winked back. He had to admit it was fun having this private game with them.

  Seth knew most of the people in attendance weren’t aware of Kade’s secret. He planned on telling them today, individually, as the day progressed. Seth had tried to talk him into just doing one announcement and getting it over with, but it was Kaden’s call.

  It was, after all, his party.

  Seth sat outside later while the third turkey deep-fried. He’d spent much of the afternoon shooting video of the festivities but needed this alone time to emotionally recharge. Leah brought him a glass of tea and sat next to him.

  “You okay?”

  Seth nodded. People had drifted in and out of the house all afternoon to talk with Seth, some in obvious shock at Kaden’s news. Right now, it was just him and Leah.

  Leah touched his hand and he met her eyes. “I’m okay,” she said. “I’ve been preparing for this. I’ll be okay today.”

  “You sure?”

  “Yeah. I don’t like that we have to do it, but it’s a relief to have it out there.” Seth knew Kaden was only telling people he’d asked Seth to move in to help and care for him and Leah. Seth also knew the way Kaden was telling it left it more than open to interpretation that Kaden was fine with whatever happened…after, between Seth and Leah. Even putting out the comment that he hoped they would find happiness together.

  He had to hand it to Kaden, the man was a thorough planner. One good thing about him being a control freak. He didn’t want people thinking badly of Leah any more than Seth did.

  She patted him on the hand again and stood, then walked away as one of Kaden’s cousins, Tom, walked over with his wife to shoot the shit for a little while. Seth had grown up with Tom even though he was a couple of years younger than Kaden and Seth.

  “This really sucks. Man, I’d never thought it. He looks so good.”

  Seth nodded and tried to focus his gaze on the flame from the propane burner under the turkey pot. He did not want to have this conversation. Most people had left it as a simple, “I’m sorry, let me know if I can do anything for you guys,” generic bullshit comment.

  Tom shook his head. “I can’t believe it.”

  “Join the club.”

  The three of them sat in silence for a moment before Tom spoke again, his voice nearly a whisper. “Is Leah going to be okay?” Seth knew Kaden had revealed a little of Leah’s past to his cousin but not about their lifestyle choices.

  Seth nodded. “I think so. That’s why Kaden asked me to move in now.” Well, that was close enough to the truth to count, he supposed.

  “Yeah. I think she’ll be okay eventually if you’re there for her.” He kept shaking his head. Seth wanted to pound it down between his shoulder blades to make him stop. “She always seems very relaxed around you, sort of like she is with Kaden. You’ll be good for her.”

  Seth didn’t want to have this conversation. At all. He couldn’t leave the turkey while it was cooking, and he couldn’t tell Tom to get the hell away from him.

  He hunkered down. “We’ll all get through it.”

  * * * *

  When they gathered around the tables outside to eat around five o’clock, Kaden stood and proposed the toast. He had Leah sitting on his right and insisted on Seth sitting on his left even though Seth had tried to move to a different table to not call attention to himself.

  By this time, Seth knew everyone had been told the news. A few of the women looked a little red-eyed and weepy, as did Kaden’s brother.

  Denise had specifically not been invited.

  “I want to propose a toast. To all my family and friends who have gathered to eat with us today, thank you for joining us. I want this day to be fun, and I have a surprise for you all once it gets dark enough.” Kaden had been eagerly talking up the light display all afternoon.

  He paused, gathering his thoughts. “This is a great day, and it’s the kind of day our lives should be filled with. I want you all to remember that for me. I feel blessed to have my beautiful wife and my best friend beside me. I love all of you, but these two people are my strength and my closest comfort.” He raised his glass. “To family, to friends, and to life. Cheers.”

  Everyone joined him. Seth fought to control his rolling stomach. He’d noticed that lately, little jagged bursts of grief threatened to spill out sometimes when he could least afford to lose control.

  Once everyone was up and taking turns going through the buffet line, Seth snuck inside the house to his room for a moment. He thought he’d gone unnoticed when he heard the tap at his door a few minutes later.

  “Yeah?”

  Kaden stepped inside and closed the door behind him. “You okay?” he softly asked.

  Seth started to nod when it hit him. He hated himself for it, but he sat on the end of his bed and cried.

  Kaden sat next to him and silently put his arm around his friend’s shoulders. When Seth composed himself a few minutes later, he apologized. “I’m sorry, dude. I shouldn’t be dumping this on you. I just… I couldn’t hold it back. I don’t know how you’re dealing as well as you are, man.”

  Kaden smiled but it looked sad. “Who says I am? I’ve had twenty years of practicing putting on a poker face as a Dom. Plus I’m an attorney. We’re all good liars. It’s genetic.”

  His comment had the desired effect—it made Seth laugh. Then they hugged, long and hard. Kaden patted him on the back. “Having you here makes it easier, believe it or not. I can see how good she is with you, and it’s one less worry. I really mean it when I say I love you.”

  “Love you too, dude. Still not doing you.”

  Kaden laughed and sat back, brushed his hands across his eyes. “Not doing you either, buddy.”

  The men sat and looked at each other. “Happy Thanksgiving, Kaden. I’m glad we’ve still got you here. I hope you’re here next year.”

  Kaden smiled. “That makes two of us.”

  Chapter Eighteen

  The week after Thanksgiving, Seth methodically worked at the oak tree with the singletail. It was one of Kaden’s favorite whips, a sixteen-plait six-foot bullwhip made of kangaroo hide, with a well-balanced handle. Seth seemed to have the most accuracy and control with it and worked to master it first before tackling some of the others. He’d gotten good enough he could nail all the balloons on the target without missing and now worked to fine-tune his control and aim with both hands, not just his right. He had also progressed enough that he was equally good in the three main throwing styles, overhand, reverse and forward crack.

  Kaden lounged in the shade of another nearby tree. There were no Christmas lights or decorations this far back on the property, so Seth didn’t have to worry about accidentally snagging any wiring with the whip.

  “Time for you to tackle a different target. That tree never did shit to you, buddy.”

  Seth looked at him. “And what would you suggest? You told me when I could take the tips off leaves, I’d be ready.”

  “I’d say you’re ready. You keep that up, I won’t have a goddamned leaf left on that thing.” He stood, then walked back to the house.

  Seth continued practicing. A few minutes later, Kaden returned with Leah, who was now dressed in jeans, a heavy leather jacket, heavy leather gloves, and sneakers. Kaden carried another heavy leather jacket and a bottle of talcum powder.

  As realization dawned, Seth felt his balls crawl up tight inside him. “Oh, hell no. I’m not using this on her yet!”

  “Why not?” Kaden asked. “You’re good enough.”

  “What if I hurt her!”

  Leah smiled. “That’s sort of the point.”

  Seth glared. “You know damn well what I mean!”

  “You won’t hurt her through her jeans. That fall and popper can’t cut through denim. Not the way you’re throwing, at least. And that’s why I brought this.” He held up the jacket. “I’ll lay it over her ass while you practice. Once you’re sure on your distance, we’ll take it away and you can hit her on denim.”

  Seth vigorously shook his head, nausea threatening. “No! I’m not ready to do that.”

  Leah walked over and looked up into his face. Her eyes went wide. “Please?”

  “Oh, no. Not the fucking puppy-dog eyes. Stop it!”

  “Please, Seth?”

  He clenched his jaw. “This isn’t fair. I’m not ready!”

  She gently grabbed his collar and stood on tiptoe so she could kiss him. “Please, Sir? For me?” Her huge, green eyes melted him.

  He closed his eyes and swore. “All right. But it’s your ass.”

  “Thank you!”

  Kaden laughed and handed Leah the jacket. She walked a short distance away and knelt on the ground, her rear facing them. She draped the jacket across her hips.

  Kaden leaned into Seth. “You are so fucked, buddy. You know that? She’s got you wrapped around her little finger.”

  “Look who’s talking.”

  Kaden smiled. “Yeah, I know. Who’s really in charge, right? We’ve both got it bad.”

  Kaden dumped some talc into his palm and laid the tip of the whip in it. “This’ll help you see where you’re hitting.”

  Seth nervously gauged his distance before he threw, hitting her a little lower than he intended but on her right ass cheek. The faint white mark from the talc showed the strike.

  Kaden nodded. “Excellent.” He grabbed the end of the whip, applied more talc. “Do it again.”

  Kaden worked with Seth for fifteen minutes. Then Kaden removed the jacket from her ass and brushed the powder off. “Now, hit her like that.”

  Seth’s nerves returned. “Man, I don’t know about this.”

  “It’s okay. Go ahead.”

  Leah looked like she was in heaven, the thuddy and not at all uncomfortable impact through the multiple layers of clothing nearly putting her in subspace despite the lack of an ongoing scene and relatively minor discomfort. She wiggled her ass at Seth. “Please, Sir.”

  He took a deep breath. “All right.” On his first throw he choked and pulled at the last second, sending it wide and to the left.

  “Stop.” Kaden walked over to him. “Don’t hesitate. That’s when you will hurt her. Or yourself. You changed at the last second. Just picture where you want it to strike and don’t hesitate. If you’re going to hesitate, it’s better to wait and not throw than it is to throw badly.”

  “All right.” Seth tried again, this time hitting her exactly where he intended, on her left cheek.

  Leah wiggled her ass at him and made a content sound.

  “You okay?” Seth asked her.

  “Ohhh yeah.”

  Kaden leaned against another tree, out of the whip’s range. “She’s going to jump us once we’re finished, so you might as well nail her good now.”

  After a few throws, Seth didn’t need the talc anymore. He slowly gained confidence as he took his time, carefully placing each strike to hit as close to the fleshy center of her ass cheeks as he could.

  Kaden could easily go after her bare flesh. Seth knew it would take him some time—and a hell of a lot of practice—to reach that degree of confidence in his abilities.

  After twenty minutes, Seth’s arm and nerves had reached their limit. He coiled the whip. “I’m done. I need a break.”

  Leah sat up and pouted. “I didn’t get any sting out of that at all.”

  Kaden laughed. He pushed away from the tree, handed the jacket to Seth, and took the whip from him. “Then get your ass bare for me and I’ll take care of that, love.”

  Like a flash she was on her feet. She kicked off her shoes, jeans, and panties, then knelt on the ground again. “Thank you, Master!”

  Kaden uncoiled the whip and took a moment to stretch his neck and roll his shoulders. As weird as it was, Seth never tired of watching Kade work with a whip. He was truly a master at it. Seth knew he needed to get plenty of video footage of them together, not just still pictures. Pictures couldn’t capture the confidence, the fluidity of Kade’s movements, the surety of his aim.

  A true Dom.

  “How are we, love?” Kade asked.

  “Green, Master.”

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