Resilience Read online

  “How do you do that?”

  “Do what?”

  “Men and women? I married Camille because I thought I was supposed to. I mean, I liked her well enough, and she was in love with me, I guess. But…” His face turned an adorable shade of pink around his cheeks. “I couldn’t…do it with her if I didn’t think about men. Lucky for me, she wasn’t much into doing it at all.”

  “Well, you did it successfully at least three times, I suppose, right?”

  “Our wedding night. And usually on our birthdays and anniversary. More I think she felt she was supposed to offer. She was on a lot of medications for her blood pressure and cholesterol, things like that. I think it hurt her sex drive. I took long showers and took care of myself so I didn’t have to bother her. She was affectionate, though. We’d watch TV snuggled on the couch. But she didn’t have much of a libido.”

  Andrew hadn’t exactly had much of one himself lately, between grief and his own medical issues.

  Except…

  He stood, walked around the table, and took the chair next to Colin. Colin watched him do it, curious but not speaking.

  Andrew leaned in, palming Colin’s face in his hands for a moment before he thoroughly snogged him, tongue and all, until Colin softly moaned again.

  Then Andrew sat back with a smile. “Finish your cinnamon roll, love. Then you’re going to drive us to your house, you’re going to pack for the weekend, call your neighbor and tell him not to worry, and then you and I are coming back here and locking ourselves in my bedroom until we either exhaust each other or break a hip. I don’t care which, at this point.”

  Colin nodded.

  Andrew smiled. “Oh, and love, we’ll need to make a stop by a drugstore.”

  “Why?”

  Andrew leaned in again, lips hovering just over Colin’s. “Because we need lube and condoms. My cock will be going in that gorgeous arse of yours before dinner tonight.”

  Chapter Eighteen

  Late Saturday afternoon, Tom stood in the basement, in front of the storage unit door, the key in his hand. Tyler slept upstairs, taking a post-blowjob nap with a full stomach from lunch on top of a glass of wine.

  Tom figured he’d have a little time before Ty realized he’d left their bed.

  The stairs weren’t as bad on Tom today as they had been, as long as he took his time and didn’t rush. And he’d brought his cane.

  Finally, Tom unlocked the door and found the light switch.

  “Motherfucker,” he muttered, staring at the piles of boxes and other items.

  So much for a fast resolution.

  With a sigh, he realized this would not be a speedy process. Tyler would want to sort through everything, not toss it unseen.

  Wanting…answers, probably. Answers he’d likely never have, to questions maybe he couldn’t even formulate.

  To know more about the man—men—they were now tethered to.

  Goddammit, Marcus. Couldn’t you have fucking left it to charity?

  Whether he’d intended to or not, Marcus hadn’t made reparations to him and Ty.

  The man had only made things worse. It’d be up to Tom and Nev to gently usher Tyler through it, at Ty’s glacial speed, until he finally reached a point of acceptance.

  A point that only Ty could set the benchmark for.

  Damn sure not going through it all today.

  Tom shut off the light and locked the door behind him. Sorting through all of this would likely have to wait for another trip—preferably one with Nevvie there to help keep Ty on track, or at least keep him distracted so Tom could start pitching shit Ty hadn’t seen. Whittle it down somewhat to a manageable pile.

  Meanwhile, maybe Dad could decipher the letters before Tom let Ty have them back.

  Back upstairs, Tom returned to the bedroom, stripped, and snuggled in bed with Tyler. Almost immediately, Tyler wrapped his body around Tommy.

  This was what mattered most to him—them. What they had together, with Nevvie. And their family time with the kids.

  Tommy had lightly dozed when Tyler awakened from his nap nearly an hour later. He’d left the curtains open when they’d climbed into bed earlier, and he could see that the rain had, for now, stopped.

  “How about we take a walk, sugar? Or even get a cab and go exploring for a little bit? Take the evening off?”

  Tyler sat up. “Are you feeling up to it?”

  “I am for right now. If we’re going to stay here while you to finish your edits, that means you need to work. So let’s spend tonight together goofing off, and tomorrow you can dig into the beast. I can always go exploring more by myself to leave you alone while you work.”

  A smile curved his guy’s lips. “You wouldn’t mind?”

  “How long have we known each other? Have I ever been incapable of keeping myself busy?”

  “Sorry, love. Of course you’re right.”

  They dressed and, after Tyler did a little exploration online to get their bearings again, they headed downstairs.

  “You realize Nevvie’s going to tease us when we post a picture of that whizzing statue, right?”

  Tyler glanced over with a smile. “Manneken-Pis is an icon. We couldn’t very well not see it, could we? And it’s not the only thing we’ll see while we’re here. There are museums and shops aplenty to keep us busy for far longer than we’ll have.”

  Tommy chuckled. “If that’s how you want to play it, sugar, sure. I still can’t believe a statue of a little boy peeing is not only famous, it has over nine hundred outfits.”

  “Brussels has its whimsy, love.”

  * * * *

  Late Saturday morning, Andrew loaded into Colin’s car for the drive to his house. On the way out, Andrew spotted that Mikey had mowed for him, but apparently hadn’t tried to disturb him.

  Perhaps Nevvie warned him.

  Colin lived ten minutes from Andrew in a modest, tidy three-two home. Older, with tall pines and oaks scattered among the other houses in his neighborhood. Inside, Andrew could imagine it likely looked much like it did the day Colin’s wife died. Family pictures lining the wall in the entryway and living room spoke to happier times.

  It also felt…hollow. Stasis, perhaps a better word. Colin headed toward his bedroom and Andrew followed, wondering if they’d be spending many nights here, or mostly at Andrew’s, where Colin would feel safer.

  “How many nights did you want me to stay over?” Colin asked as he headed for his closet.

  Andrew settled on the bed. “How many can I talk you into, love?”

  He adored the way Colin blushed, the pink creeping into his cheeks as he smiled. “How about tonight and tomorrow night, and then see if you still even like me.”

  “Or if I haven’t scared you off.”

  Colin’s smile widened even as his blush deepened. “I don’t think that’ll happen.”

  “My thoughts were that perhaps Monday and Tuesday nights I could stay here with you. That would give us time alone, without my family around. Wednesday night back at my house.” He stood and walked over to Colin. “So I can get you drunk and take you to bed and not worry about you trying to drive home. Perhaps once you meet my entire family, you’ll understand what I mean by how sympathetic and welcoming they are.”

  Colin’s soft drawl ripped at Andrew’s soul, the pain in his voice. “That sure would be nice, for a change.”

  Andrew palmed his cheek. “I don’t know if Tyler and Thomas will be home from Brussels by then, but I can’t wait for you to meet them.”

  Colin studied his feet for a moment. When he spoke, he didn’t look up. “Where are you looking for this to go, Andrew?”

  He cupped Colin’s face in his hands and made him meet his gaze. “As I told you last night, life is far too short at our ages to be coy. I’m not looking to play games. I’m serious about this, about seeing if we have a chance to make this into something. Aren’t you tired of being afraid? Especially of people who truly aren’t considerate of your needs or happiness?” />
  Colin swallowed hard and finally nodded.

  Andrew pulled him in for a long hug. “Pack what you need, love. I plan to show you there’s a better way of living, and it doesn’t involve loneliness.”

  On the way out, Colin spotted his neighbor across the street and walked over to quickly speak with him. Andrew waited by Colin’s car, not wanting to make him more nervous than he already was.

  When Colin returned and they got in, Andrew smiled. “What did you tell him, love?”

  “The truth. Spending the night with a friend who’s older than me and alone at home this weekend.” He met Andrew’s gaze. “Told him your son is out of town, and so is your daughter and her husband.” He finally smiled. “Not my fault he incorrectly assumed the reasons why I’m spending the night.”

  “That is one nice assumption at our age.” Andrew reached over and rested his hand on Colin’s thigh, pleased when Colin’s hand settled over his. “They don’t necessarily assume we’re a ‘couple.’ It’s not an issue for me, of course, but I know you’re nervous.”

  “I don’t want to be nervous. I want to be as brave as you are.”

  Andrew squeezed his thigh. “You are brave, love. Accepting my invitation to move last night and sit with us was the epitome of bravery. And everything else since then, including this.”

  They stopped at a drug store and Andrew asked Colin to wait in the car, unless he really wanted to go in.

  Colin was happy to oblige.

  While Andrew was in the store, he placed a quick call to Karen. “Love, I’m curious, do you have an ETA for your return tonight?”

  “No. Why? Is everything all right?”

  He decided to plunge right in. “Yes, everything’s fine, love. I have a…guest, if you get my drift. An overnight guest from last night who will be staying with me tonight as well.”

  “Really?” She practically squealed. “What’s her name?”

  “Colin.”

  Karen sounded confused. “That’s not a woman’s name.”

  “No, because it is not.”

  It took her a moment before she literally said it. “D’oh! I’m sorry, Dad. I forgot. You were with Mom for so long, and—”

  “Yes, love. Right. No worries, but a time, if you please?”

  “Probably not until at least five or six.”

  “Good. Now, he’s very nervous. I’ll fill you in later but no playful teasing, right? I’ve sworn to him that our family is very accepting and matter-of-fact. Let him settle in, if that’s what happens, before you give him hell, as it were.”

  “Gotcha. Does Nevvie know?”

  “She met him last night at the game. I’m hoping you’ll be seeing a lot of him around, but his children have not only disowned him, apparently they have tried to sabotage any hopes of a relationship for him at every turn. He’s widowed, but they didn’t take well to his admission upon her death that he’s gay.”

  “Oooh. Okay, yeah, no worries. I’ll tell Bill. You want us to bring food home?”

  “No, but give me a call when you’re about thirty minutes out and I’ll cook for us all. I’d like Colin to start small. Wednesday night will likely be a trial by fire for him.”

  “Will do. Love you, Dad. I’m sure we’ll love him.”

  He smiled, the way he always did when one of the “kids” called him that. “Love you, too, sweetheart. Kiss the princess for me.”

  “Roger. She misses Grandpa.”

  When Andrew returned to the car, he laughed. “I’m sure the clerk was wondering why I was buying these, but she didn’t ask.” He put the bag on the floor, by his feet. “In the future, we can always purchase from Amazon, if we wish, and avoid the trip. I obviously wasn’t expecting such a pleasant development.”

  He didn’t want Colin to feel even more nervous by knowing Andrew had put out the word to his kids about the man.

  Colin smiled and unexpectedly leaned in to kiss him.

  Andrew savored it, sensing this was about the man trying to find his “bravery,” or something like that. Kissing him in a parking lot in broad daylight.

  “Thank you,” Colin said.

  “For what, love?”

  “For…I don’t know. Taking a chance on me.”

  “Ah, you thank me now. By tomorrow you might be cursing my name.”

  “No.” Colin’s intent gaze penetrated through the core of Andrew’s soul. “This…feels right.” He nodded. “Really right. I mean…” He stared at Andrew for a moment and leaned in to kiss him again. “Right.”

  Andrew wouldn’t deny he was feeling stirrings below the belt. “Then let’s return to my home and we can see exactly how right it is.”

  * * * *

  They were nearly back to Andrew’s when Nevvie texted him.

  How’s everything going?

  He quickly texted her back.

  My guest is still here and will be again overnight. I’d say it’s going well. :)

  Colin turned into the driveway when she replied.

  Need me to get Karen and Co. out of your way tonight?

  He loved Nevvie for her beautifully scheming mind.

  No, love. I want him to meet them since they weren’t there last night.

  “I like it out here,” Colin said after he shut the engine off. “It’s quieter than my neighborhood.”

  “We like the peace,” Andrew said, trying not to think about the day that peace had been shattered by gunfire. “Peggy and her husband, Adam, built the house out here when their children were little. Tom, Tyler, and Nevvie bought property next door around the time I married Peggy, and Nevvie’s mother and father bought property across the road. So we have very few neighbors, and our road is private. No through-traffic.”

  “I’m sorry I haven’t read any of your son’s books.” Colin made no move to get out, still staring at the yard, down toward the pond.

  “I can loan you a couple, if you wish.”

  Colin bashfully smiled before finally meeting Andrew’s gaze. “I keep waiting for something horrible to happen,” he said. “This feels too easy.”

  Andrew stroked his arm. “I think after what you’ve been through, it more than allows for an ‘easy’ time to be had, does it not?”

  “I guess.” He reached for the door handle. “I know I shouldn’t be thinkin’ like this yet, but when I woke up this morning, after I realized where I was, I thought how nice it’d be to wake up here every morning.”

  Now Andrew held his arm, “Why shouldn’t you think like that?”

  “Because we just met last night, and here I am, havin’ fantasies like that.”

  “Thomas and Tyler tell the story of how they first met. It was in St. Petersburg, at a bookstore. Tyler was doing an author talk and book signing, and Tom was still a student at USF in Tampa. Tyler says he noticed Tom immediately when Tom first walked in. Later, when Tom came through the line to get his books signed, Tyler invited him out for coffee. For his part, Tom says he was smitten just listening to Tyler talk. And he’d sensed Tyler seeking him out in the audience as he did. Which Tyler admits he was. From that point on, they were practically inseparable. Love at first sight.

  “My own sweet Peggy. I felt drawn to her from the moment we met. It did not take us long at all before we knew we were in love. Mere weeks. My first point being that, at our ages, a long, drawn out courtship is not going to gain us accolades by some unnamed others.

  “My second point being—why not us?”

  Colin drew in a sharp breath. “Because I never have that kind of luck.”

  Andrew kissed him. “Perhaps your luck has changed, love.”

  They headed inside and locked themselves in. Andrew led Colin to their bedroom and—again, locking them in—sat him down on the bed and kissed him.

  He didn’t want anything to disturb this time together, and suspected Colin might feel too self-conscious to do anything intimate if they weren’t alone in the house.

  No rush, Andrew savored undressing him, letting Colin undress him.
It was adorable to discover Colin had never used a condom before. Andrew lay back on the bed and showed Colin how to roll it on him, lube him, and then let Colin straddle him while Andrew slowly prepped Colin with his fingers.

  They likely wouldn’t do this too many times, certainly not every time they were together, but Andrew wanted this man.

  Needed him, like oxygen, like sunlight.

  Sensed if he didn’t claim him, Colin might retreat and second-guess what they’d done up to that point, try to explain it away.

  To sink back into the uncomfortable familiarity of his lonely existence, no matter how miserable he felt there.

  Colin leaned forward, softly gasping with pleasure, eyes closed as Andrew took his time. With Andrew’s free hand, he encircled Colin’s rigid cock and lightly squeezed it. Another time, he’d enjoy letting Colin pitch to him, but today he wanted his guy coming with his cock buried in him at the same time.

  In Andrew’s mind, Colin was already his. It was simply a matter of Colin finally feeling free enough to admit it.

  Although the man did seem to be most of the way there already.

  Colin softly gasped, leaning in to kiss Andrew. Nothing tentative about that now, compared to last night. The man was a fast learner. Having had a taste of what he wanted, he was eager for more.

  Andrew wanted to give it to him, as much as he could.

  Once Andrew had him ready, Colin slowly impaled himself on Andrew’s cock, rocking back and forth and taking a little more in each time. Andrew started stroking Colin’s cock in time with his movements, smiling up at him.

  “Better, love?”

  “Fantastic!” He slanted his mouth over Andrew’s, a deep, sucking kiss that threatened to send Andrew spiraling over the edge too soon. So earnest and passionate, eager, ready—Colin’s lifetime of desires and fantasies finally made real with someone completely willing and able to fulfill them.